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  1. Jo
    2016-06-29 @ 2:22 AM

    Dear Julia..

    I stumbled upon your page quite by accident. You see, I’m in a very “dark” place and was looking up about suicide.

    My father killed himself years ago. I often wonder how he is and if he is okay. I’m not able to contact him, but being that I struggle badly mentally and emotionally and have since I was young, I thought he would be more inclined to come through to me in some way to offer me love, support and to advise me against doing what he did. I now wonder if maybe he doesn’t because I am meant to go the same way?

    Just so you know, I’ve tried therapy and been on medications, and yet this unrelenting emotional pain won’t leave. I am terribly lonely, depressed and suffer from lifelong social anxiety. I want to move forward in life but it’s so, so hard. I am not close to anyone in my family and have no close friends. I feel completely trapped and hopeless with no one to turn to.

    Is it possible that some souls are meant to suicide? I have read about this in another spiritual book, and I’ve seen talk of this on that website, “Channeling Erik”. I am skeptical about the validity of this site, yet intrigued. Supposedly, the young man who the site is referenced after was supposed to suicide as part of his soul’s evolution. They also have an aspect of the site whereby the resident channeler channels famous people. In one channeling, Robin Williams was contacted and Robin said that his death was supposed to happen as it did.

    Could you tell me your thoughts on all this and how one would know whether suicide is actually a part of their soul’s plan? And can you give me tips on how to reach my father?

    Thank you.


    • Julia
      2016-06-29 @ 11:58 AM

      You know Jo, I’ve been there! And let me tell you, it’s not about a soul plan at all, it’s about some buried experiences in you and also, no doubt, in your other lives. The only thing that saved me was regression therapy and past life therapy (the same therapist). After about 10 intense treatments I began to be mentally and emotionally quite healthy (at least for me!). Suicide in your depressed condition is far from the best option. This is not a moral judgement, but a concern for you. Most suicides I’ve worked with after death were either in shock or remorse. Not all, but most, especially the younger ones. You need to find your father. Your need to communicate with him is the main reason you are considering suicide. You probably won’t find him that way either.

      I give tips on how to contact the dead on my home page at the bottom and, more extensively, in my book, The Last Frontier. If you need help, we could do a phone session together but I do charge for that.

      You are a wonderful writer. Have you developed that at all?


    • Kristine
      2020-02-26 @ 4:41 AM


      You replied to Jo stating that if they also commit suicide they wouldn’t see there father?
      So if a boyfriend committed suicide and the girlfriend was so distraught from all the pain, grief, despair, and if she took her life as well. What would happen to her?
      Isn’t god a loving god. Would he actually keep them separated?
      Or what will actually happen?

  2. Jo
    2016-06-29 @ 7:01 PM

    Hi,  Julia!

    Thank you so much for getting back to me!  🙂

    It’s interesting that suicide can be due to “residue” from past lives.  I actually contacted a site years ago regarding the same issue and was told as much.

    As for your generous offer to contact me, to be honest,  I’m in such a bad way financially that I couldn’t afford a session…but I thank you, just the same.   I also wanted to make clear that my feelings to suicide have nothing whatsoever to do with my father, and I find it perplexing that you automatically assume so. My reasons stem from personal and environmental factors at present, but also go way back to my childhood (I’m middle-aged, in case you’re wondering!) My wish to contact my father is simply because he sadly succeeded in doing what I’ve long struggled with. I’ve had these feelings since I was 14,  years before my father would take his life. I want to know if he’s safe, mentally and emotionally ok,  and what his perspective on suicide as a victim is now vs. prior to the act.

    Anyway,  I’m so glad for you that past life therapy helped,  Julia.  🙂 It’s amazing how much of our other lives can influence our present.

    Lastly, on a somewhat related note, it is almost exactly a year ago that I had an Akashic reading and told my life purpose. This put me in a major emotional tailspin. It validated my lifelong passion, but still left me in doubt and conflict over whether what I was told was “right” because I have never achieved my dreams. A year later, I still have barely made any headway towards my passion, no thanks to my depression and anxiety..and then the longer I don’t fulfill this dream, the more worthless and depressed I feel. It’s a vicious cycle. 🙁

    And thank you for your very kind compliment on my writing!  Yes,  I write (poems,  lyrics and the occasional fan fiction).  I also journal quite a bit. I find it very cathartic to express my feelings with words.  Unfortunately,  it’s not enough to ease the stench of personal demons and the unrelenting dissatisfaction with my present circumstances.

    Anyway, again, thank you so much for taking the time to write me back.  I will explore your website further and see how it may help me now and in the future.

    Very Sincerely,

  3. Derek
    2017-06-08 @ 12:15 AM

    I’ve read a lot about suicides in the after life. The way I have come to understand it, is that if there is any regret left over, and I’m sure there most certainly is at times (since our personality/beliefs at death simply carries over to the ‘period’ immediately after death), it is always coming from the human personality that has not fully transitioned back into the Spirit World. In other words, there can be no regret or ‘looking back’ when a soul is fully transitioned back into higher frequencies of ‘who they really are’. Even those souls who have hellish NDE’s, only experience this temporarily since we are creating that experience based on the beliefs we have taken with us from the previous life. There can be no such thing as ‘regret’ when you are fully assimilated back into ‘Who You Really Are’. When people are talking about souls who regret stuff from their previous life, often this is mis-understood, to believe that the Soul’s true essence (Spirit/Source itself) would ever regret anything in a life, but every aspect of the life is actually celebrated. Kelly Sammy is a well known suicide NDE and I highly recommend her experience. Her own suicide was celebrated in the after life because that TOO, was a potential option since all potentials exist already simultaneously.

    I think there is a giant mass of mis-understandings about suicide in the afterlife, because of the quality of the information we are receiving. NDE’s that actually transition far enough in the death process (many NDE’s simply do not and hence why they come back with so many differing beliefs and view points, not realizing that often the experiencer has manifested much of the experience since the early stages of transition are often quite subjective), in my estimation are the best resource we have right here and now.

    • Julia
      2017-06-09 @ 10:27 PM

      Although I appreciate many of your points, assuming that a Near-Death Experience is anything like an actual death, is the real misunderstanding. Truthfully, in NDE’s there is no real choice on the part of the experiencer to live or die. We know this from cross-cultural NDE studies as well as from earlier accounts of NDE’s in the USA. And there are too many current NDEs in which the experiencer is furious with the resuscitators for bringing them back. Many return against their will. This is NOT death. This is a mystical experience brought about by enormous stress, as are most mystical experiences.

      Of course, in simultaneous time the transcendent self as well as the dead self exist parallel to the self in the flesh, as does all our incarnations. Some part of us then does not regret because experience, whether suicide or not, is just that–experience. However, I have worked with tons of suicides and 99% of them have regretted it. Furthermore, they are usually shocked at the violence they turned against themselves. In one case, the person was overwhelmed with desperation to discover that he still existed.

      • Derek
        2019-08-08 @ 7:32 AM

        Hi Julia, if I may say so, and this is a very delayed response……the “lack of choice” in NDE’s that you are referring to, as to come back or not was explained by a couple of different NDE’rs…or hypothesized. I can’t recall who it was that said this.

        They said there absolutely is always a choice. But, when someone comes back and says “I was told I had to come back”, the choice quite possibly was already being made by……them….the “larger them”….aka oversoul/higher self or whatever you want to call it

        In other words, because they were still experiencing through their human personality during the NDE, it appeared as though there was a being outside of them making the choice to tell them to come back. But, it was actually……”them”…The Rest of Them, (the part of us that does not “leave” the Spirit world), that made the choice. But, the experiencer simply does not realize that and assumes “the choice was made FOR them”, rather than realizing it was already made BY them (the larger them)

        I’ll say it again. Those who feel regret, I would strongly suggest are still experiencing through their human personalities and have not fully transitioned back yet. Nanci Danison had one of the most prolific NDE’s to date and she explains this so well in her books. She claims, just like OBE’rs say, we absolutely manifest what we truly believe on death and we can even create hell. But…’s TEMPORARY. Because it’s our beliefs which create. Everyone transitions back though eventually, even we spend time in our self created hell. Again, it’s temporary and not something we need to fear or prepare for.

        • Julia Assante
          2019-08-16 @ 3:38 PM

          Dear Derek, sorry for the late reply.
          When I think of reports of people who very definitely did NOT want to come back but did anyway, it reassures me that a conscious choice is not really involved. One woman came back after resuscitation and screamed at her doctor for “saving” her. Also to consider is the trans-cultural material. In the literature of NDE reports in India, for instance, absolutely no one has a choice. They are simply sent back.

    • Conny Nicolai
      2017-10-03 @ 10:03 AM

      Abraham-Hicks say
      everyone goes into the pure positiv energy and suiciders don’t regret-they feel a huge relief! I believe that too and I guess a medium filters the words of suiciders, because either a medium has tons of regretters or tons of noregretters due to the mediums believes!

      • Julia
        2017-10-08 @ 1:51 PM

        Dear Abraham, I have both, probably because I really don’t have expectations but stay open to surprises. I never know what will happen when I am in contact with people on the other side.

      • Julia Assante
        2019-02-09 @ 12:59 PM

        Actually Conny, that is not at all true. My experience with suiciders, as you call them, is extremely various. However, most, but not all, regret the violence they have done to themselves. Some are extremely happy to be free of physical reality. Others committed suicide because they knew that later they would develop a dreaded disease. And so on. Believe me, no matter how a person dies, many of them do not go into a positive and pure energy but continue laboring under the dramas they wrote for themselves in life.

  4. Angela
    2017-12-05 @ 6:58 AM

    I am in a dark place. I feel tournamented by the man I love. It’s a complicated situation. But we are separated and I can’t seem to move on. How do you live a life separated from the one you love. All your hopes dreams die with divorce. And then you see him go on easily giving the life and love and family you wanted to someone else. My heart is so broken. I can’t seem to heal from the past. And I don’t understand the world I live in. Work, I feel like a robot. Just there to produce and if you don’t meet the goals you will get fired. I fall into this trace like state where suicide is the only answer. I’m tired of trying. I’m tired of this life. I don’t know how to live this life. And I don’t want a life separated from the man I love. Why should he get everything without me. Maybe it’s selfish. But how do you accept, heal, and move on. Time has done nothing to help heal. I want to Erase my heart my memories of him. But yet it is impossible. We keep drifting in and out of each other’s life. I know my family and loved ones would be sad but I don’t live to please others. I feel stuck in this wheel of pain and I can’t do it anymore. I’m tired of feeling this way. I’ve done everything to try and cope. I’ve tried to accept reality. But I don’t want to live with this burden anymore. I can’t heal and I can’t let go. So how do you live with pain? How do you let go?

    • Julia
      2018-01-24 @ 1:40 PM

      Angela, it is possible. I lost my first great love as well as my first husband. Today I lead a full and magical life. But it takes work. When the pain is as severe as yours, it tells me it is anchored in more than your experience with the guy you love. Please consider finding a regression therapist. Commit to about 4 treatments and I’ll bet the worst of your pain will vanish. Your world view will take a big shift too.

      Do it!


    • Julia
      2018-03-07 @ 8:24 PM

      Dear Angela, suicide is never the solution. You have Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder. The best thing you can do is go to a good regression therapist near you to find out what’s really going on. Believe me, you will be sooooooooooo glad you did not end your life because of someone else. Keep in touch!

  5. Shayna Magdich
    2019-01-16 @ 8:12 PM

    Dear Julia, are there any particular circumstances where suicide may be the solution? When i say this i am talking about chronic pain. I have something called Trigeminal Nueralga. Its a form of brain damage. Mine is Atypical so i am not a good candidate for any of the surguries that can help people with typical TN. This has been going on for 7 months. Pain in my teeth, and face every single day. It hurts to eat, to talk, to brush my teeth. It even hurts to speak sometimes. I am only 42, and i have no support system. TN, as well as A Typical TN is a progressive disease, with no cure. I can’t imagine this becoming even worse. I have watched myself turn in to a shell of a person, and lose everything in just a few months. Am i supposef to live the next 5, 10, 20 years like this?

    • Julia Assante
      2019-01-24 @ 2:50 PM

      Dear Shayna, Before you consider suicide, read Anthony William’s book: Medical Medium. He looks at the whole viral problem quite differently from typical western medicine. And he provides solutions. You can get well again! Julia

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